The things kids say

Bear with me, guys, this post does not end up being about birth.

We’re driving down the road as a family.

Connor:  Mom, what’s it like being a nurse?

Me:  I’m not a nurse…but would you like to hear about what nurses do?

Connor:  Oh – I mean a doula.  What’s it like being a doula?

Me:  Well, it’s the best job in the world.  Having a baby is hard work, and moms are sometimes scared, and I get to help them stay calm and relaxed.  And the dads are often scared too, and I get to help them just as much.

Connor:  I’m getting scared just thinking about it.

Me:  Oh?

Connor:  Yeah – about that part where I have to stick my penis into her vagina…

Me:  Oh…..yeah….actually I’m not there for that part.  (Dying now, trying so hard not to laugh)

Rich:  Connor, don’t worry, it may seem scary now, but when you are older and you meet the right person you’ll think that part is a lot of fun, and it will pretty much be all you can think about.

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9 Responses to “The things kids say”


  1. 1 Dan April 7, 2008 at 9:53 am

    Wait… you have to do what??

  2. 2 Cheeky April 7, 2008 at 9:55 am

    Lately at my house we’ve been having LOTS of conversations about how upset my five year old is that he can’t grow a baby inside of him. Sometimes he’s sad and disappointed about it, sometimes he’s verging on angry. I try my best to comfort him but it’s hard not to chuckle at least a little.

  3. 3 Jennifer April 7, 2008 at 10:25 am

    That is FUNNY! How old is he?

  4. 4 jenkraus1 April 7, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    ROFLMAO! Ohmygod I love that kid.

  5. 5 Karen April 7, 2008 at 1:45 pm

    oh my goodness, that is hysterical!

  6. 6 Tiarnna April 7, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    ROFL, that is too stinkin funny!!!!!!!!!!

    yeah, how old is he? Cause we haven’t gone down that path yet…….

  7. 7 Kristina April 7, 2008 at 2:31 pm

    He’s 5 1/2, but I’ve been talking to him about sex and stuff long before he could talk even. I don’t remember not knowing about sex when I grew up. Also it helped me talk about it from a very early age, then there was no ackward sex talk “birds and the bees” time to sit down and go over it all. I remember learning in an early childhood psychology college class that when difficult subjects come up with children, you can tell everything and the kid will take away from it what they need, and sort of block out the rest that’s over their head. That’s the stance I’ve taken and so far it’s worked well.

  8. 8 journeytocrunchville April 8, 2008 at 7:17 pm

    Classic! I love it. My dh is already getting a little miffed at how candid I am with our daughter. She has been having water births in our bath tub for about the last month, pushing babies out of her “bagina”. She hasn’t asked how the baby got in there yet but I plan on being honest on a simplistic level. She’s only 3.

  9. 9 Brant April 12, 2008 at 6:29 pm

    You really need to keep Rich away from the kids, its rubbing off on them.


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